Tuesday, March 24, 2009

Wishing Death on Reality Shows

So I am SUCKED in to a couple of reality shows right now, and I scratch my head wondering what it is that keeps me watching. He are the top three that get under my skin:

I am currently into Running in Heels. They could not  have picked interns more dumb or more catty. They are so quick to turn on each other, and they can't handle criticism for their idiot mistakes. I really wonder how these people got internships. Did they do an interview? You can tell right off hand that they are mentally fresh out of first grade. 
Ashley is a big kid. I don't know anyone who can't focus on their work because they are jealous of what someone else is doing. I could never be friends with someone like her without pulling my hair out.
Talita? Idiot. That's all I have to say. She claims she wants to write, but she can't properly conduct an interview at a fashion show. "Whats' your favorite beauty accessory?" Who cares. If YOU sum up the average LA girl, then I could never insult my intelligence and go out there. With your non-paper trained dog. I don't blame the dog, though, I blame the incompetent owner.
Ok, and there's Samantha. She doesn't bug me as much. She's a little slow too, but she's letting everyone else's comments kinda roll of her back. Yeah, she left early Friday to see her boyfriend, but if the bosses don't care-then why should you care Ashley? Choke on a hot dog, really. 

Now onto the Real World. I'm watching that too, and that one's not that bad. BUT, I got a beef with Katelynn. You're getting used to your female body, so you wrap yourself around a pole? I'm offended by you. I had to get used to a woman's body too, but for me, it was puberty. I didn't start sluttin' it up. It scares me to think that is your image of a strong sexy woman. Getting used to your new role as a woman, you need to start trying to lift up women, and act like a lady. You snap your fingers and get attitude when you're told to clean up a mess. If you would clean it up in the first place, you'd save people a lot of breath.

For the Love of Ray J. Come on, man. Nobody wants you. You're short, and you can't sing. You were on a cancelled TV show as a teen, and you made a sex tape. You should not have been rewarded with a dating show. Then again, the only people who get them are washed up anyway. All the girls on there are rather strange-too much for comfort. 

Unique, you need to exercise your right to wear a bra. Chardonnay, go back to that pole you climbed off of. Feisty, you need a good detox. Danger. A face tattoo? Really? Who are you, Mike Tyson? Then again, it doesn't make you look any worse than you already do. You are a little scary. COCKtail. I had to caps the COCK in there. You're a gold-digging whore. Face it. 

Tuesday, February 24, 2009

What the Hell Were You Thinking?

I think John Legend took the words right outta my mouth.

Dear Editor:
I'm trying to understand what possible motivation you may have had for publishing that vile cartoon depicting the shooting of the chimpanzee that went crazy. I guess you thought it would be funny to suggest that whomever was responsible for writing the Economic Recovery legislation must have the intelligence and judgment of a deranged, violent chimpanzee, and should be shot to protect the larger community. Really? Did it occur to you that this suggestion would imply a connection between President Barack Obama and the deranged chimpanzee? Did it occur to you that our president has been receiving death threats since early in his candidacy? Did it occur to you that blacks have historically been compared to various apes as a way of racist insult and mockery? Did you intend to invoke these painful themes when you printed the cartoon?
If that's not what you intended, then it was stupid and willfully ignorant of you not to connect these easily connectable dots. If it is what you intended, then you obviously wanted to be grossly provocative, racist and offensive to the sensibilities of most reasonable Americans. Either way, you should not have printed this cartoon, and the fact that you did is truly reprehensible. I can't imagine what possible justification you have for this. I've read your lame statement in response to the outrage you provoked. Shame on you for dodging the real issue and then using the letter as an opportunity to attack Rev. Sharpton. This is not about Rev. Sharpton. It's about the cartoon being blatantly racist and offensive.
I believe in freedom of speech, and you have every right to print what you want. But freedom of speech still comes with responsibilities and consequences. You are responsible for printing this cartoon, and I hope you experience some real consequences for it. I'm personally boycotting your paper and won't do any interviews with any of your reporters, and I encourage all of my colleagues in the entertainment business to do so as well. I implore your advertisers to seriously reconsider their business relationships with you as well.
You should print an apology in your paper acknowledging that this cartoon was ignorant, offensive and racist and should not have been printed.
I'm well aware of our country's history of racism and violence, but I truly believe we are better than this filth. As we attempt to rise above our difficult past and look toward a better future, we don't need the New York Post to resurrect the images of Jim Crow to deride the new administration and put black folks in our place. Please feel free to criticize and honestly evaluate our new president, but do so without the incendiary images and rhetoric.
John Legend